Senator Cruz Rips Democrat Bill for Undermining Hobby Lobby Decision

By Elizabeth Nelson

Sens. Patty Murray, D-Wash., and Mark Udall, D-Colo. Introduced a bill that will force all religious companies, regardless of their stand on the “oops we forgot to pull out, “ “advanced birth control” methods, to provide Plan B to their employees. So, Senate Democrats want to force a “fix,” and go around the SCOTUS, and Senator Cruz had some tough words for these DemonRats.

  

Thursday on Capitol Hill, Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, had a message for President Obama and Senate Democrats voting to undermine the Supreme Court’s Hobby Lobby decision: “If you’re litigating against nuns, you have probably done something wrong.”

Sixty votes were needed to debate the bill, which was sponsored by Sens. Patty Murray, D-Wash.,  and Mark Udall, D-Colo. However, the Senate voted 56 to 43, largely on party lines, in favor of upholding religious freedom of employers. In his prepared speech, Cruz added, “Mr. President, it saddens me that there are not 100 senators here unified, regardless of our faith, standing together protecting the religious liberty rights of everyone.” Watch the video above for his full statement.

So, Hobby Lobby won their case, in Supreme Court, and now the Demonrats want to force American citizens, to go against their faith? Is this America or Russia? No Christian Persecution in ObamaNation, huh? Explain to me how Hobby Lobby agrees with liberal free thinkers, that “a woman’s body is her own” and employers and taxpayers should “stay out of a woman’s bedroom.”

Therefore it should be her responsibility and not her employer’s, if what she wants to put in her body goes against their beliefs, because it surmounts to a chemical spontaneous abortion, as the fertilized egg is not allowed to become what God intended it to be, unlike the regular pills that put the egg to sleep. No ovulation, no pregnancy, and Hobby Lobby was more than willing to provide those numerous forms of BC, in an insurance plan.

 Moral of this story:

Today’s overly-LIBerated woman wants to live as a man does; equal pay for doing the same job at the same hours, and free to have sex with whomever and how many she pleases, with no reproductions or repercussions socially or morally. Well, if women want to play like a man, they should pay like man.

It’s the Pot Calling: Bill Maher calls liberals “useless Obama hacks without shred of intellectual honesty”

By Elizabeth Nelson

It’s always amusing to watch the Liberal Left turn on and devour its

own, this time it’s our favorite liberal leftist Bill Maher how is now calling liberals, “useless Obama hacks without shred of intellectual honesty.” 

Talking about the NSA, “This is exactly what they said they weren’t going to do,” he said. “Just, you know, be nosy and look into the lives of private people. … And I just want to say, if this were happening under Bush, liberals would be apoplectic. I’m sorry, but liberals are just sometimes useless Obama hacks without a shred of intellectual honesty.”


I hate to admit it, but I actually agree with him on this one.  He’s right, and not just about the NSA, but about any of the Scandals facing this president.  If this had been any other president in the GOP, the liberals would have been so incensed that he’d have been out on this arse by now.

Lying liberals jumped up, as if he’d stepped on their tails and they tried desperately to save their liberal lying face by speaking up to defend themselves: Democratic Rep. Donna Edwards jumped in and argued that she was indeed apoplectic over the surveillance, and that a liberal advocate was needed on the court that oversees NSA surveillance.
  

Liberal author Ron Suskind argued that government spying has greatly increased since President Obama took office and that Edward Snowden “had provided the goods to make the case that is real.”
 

“The question now is what we are going to do about it?” he asked, receiving applause.



Ironically, even in their own self-defense argument, they never once tried to validated or refute Maher’s point of, “Obama promised we wouldn’t the exact same thing Bush did, and yet we are doing what Bush did and more.” What’s even funnier still, and liberals can't see it, they credit Snowden for the “spying leak” when, wait, “Bush was [what?] spying on the American people?” Tell me liberal brain children, please, because Obama and Biden had already told you president Bush “was spying on your phone calls and emails;” so how was he doing this, with his vast intellect and ESP skills?

Liberals say and do the darndest things

By Correctamundo

It's the end of the week, folks - tiime to unwind with some real humor, straight from the mouths of liberals.  We even have so some oldies but goodies.

DING, DING, DING! Liberal Lunacy Alert! Liberal Lunacy Alert!

By Correctamundo  

One liberal chick has finally solved the rape AND gun issue - TEACH MEN NOT TO RAPE, THEN A WOMAN WON'T HAVE A NEED FOR A GUN! Yes, a criminal who does not live by society's standards or laws will heed that advice. I'm glad we don't have to talk about this issue anymore.

A collection of dumb liberals saying dumb things

By Correctamundo 

We all say stupid stuff from time to time....note that I said 'from time to time', meaning not all the time. But what comes out of the liberal mouth is consistently dumb.

"I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares [sic] of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.'" ~ Sheryl Crow

"Isn't it a little racist to call it Black Friday?" ~ Joy Behar

"In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I'm not joking." ~ Joe Biden

"African Americans watch the same news at night that ordinary Americans do." ~ Bill Clinton

"In case you missed it, this week, there was a tragedy in Kansas. Ten thousand people died - an entire town destroyed" ~ Barack Obama on a tornado that killed 12 people

"If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very very low crime rate." ~ Marion Barry"A zebra does not change its spots." ~ Al Gore

"We'd like to avoid problems, because when we have problems, we can have troubles." ~ Wesley Bolin, former Gov of AZ

"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, ‘Thank God, I'm still alive.' But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again." ~ Barbara Boxer

"There is no terrorist threat. Yes, there have been horrific acts of terrorism and, yes, there will be acts of terrorism again. But that doesn't mean that there's some kind of massive terrorist threat." ~ Michael Moore

"Every month that we do not have an economic recovery package 500 million Americans lose their jobs." ~ Nancy Pelosi

Your complete guide to becoming a liberal

By Correctamundo 

From the lesser known Uncyclopedia comes a how-to guide on how to be a liberal. Here are some highlights:

Article written in the style of its subject This article is funny because it is written in the real or imagined writing style of its subject. If you do not find it funny, it is probably because you are an ignorant cultural philistine who does not recognise this without explanation. If you still do not find the article funny, that is probably because a joke loses its humor when it is explained. If you hadn't been so ignorant, then you wouldn't have needed to have the joke explained to you in the first place.

WARNING at least 10^-12 % of what is written in this article is considered to be false. If you're allergic to the truth (if you’re an American Liberal in other words) and are also allergic to Wikipedia-style citations and references with links to the awful truth, DO NOT READ THIS ARTICLE! Uncyclopedia and the authors of this article cannot be held responsible for any damage, injury or liberal sissy fits and anal bleeding this article may cause. Classic Liberals and Liberals outside of the USA may not understand this or get all of the jokes, American Liberals are Neo-Liberals who practice Liberal Fascism ^[1] aka Communism and only pretend to be real Liberals.

This is an ever changing guide to how to be a liberal. It is often deleted by liberals and recreated at least twice a month, please see censorship for the reason why. Never the same page twice. Many have asked the question of just how does one become a liberal? This how-to guide will show you how.

History

How does one become a liberal, or rather how did liberalism come about? Around 3120 BC Liberalism was invented by Alfred Dinklelberry who had decided to use his whining and crying skills for monetary gain. He found that if he challenged governments by hating them, calling their leaders names, and protesting, and he wrote books, people would buy them. He later found that he could lead others in protests where they simply chant the same slogan over and over again until they get their way. He also found that by playing the blame game that he could blame others for his failures and get himself elected to government. The motto is Blame somebody else, which always works for liberals. Then if he just took up causes he did not believe in like environmentalism, peace, socialism, and so on, he could trick people into supporting him.

Together We Can: Raise Taxes

American Liberals are all about spreading the wealth and anti-corporation though many work for or take lobbyist money from mega-corporations anyway. It is also a well-known fact that most Liberals are bong-sniffing hippies. Liberals are most likely yuppies who dread about working hard, but will never give a dollar to the homeless man in front of their office buildings. Are those really liberals? They may whine about income inequality until our ears bleed, but the homeless man just sits there and would love to have their prestigious jobs. Well that homeless man is not a true liberal or else he'd have sold his soul to Moloch like the other liberals in exchange for wealth, fame, a good career, or at least win the lottery, or make a fortune in the stock market, or marry a rich woman.

Our corruption does not count!

The rule here is simple: "What liberals do on their time is fine, times nine." Quote taken courtesy of Liberal Tax Deduction Schemes: Chapter 14: Multiply deduction by nine".

Democratic corruption does not count. Only Republican corruption counts.

Remember that the public has a short-memory, so if you accuse Conservatives of doing something, the public will forget that your party did it last year, or a decade ago, or up to fifty years ago. You are not a hypocrite if the public forgets your misdeeds and your accuse Conservatives of the same misdeeds. Remember that Liberal corruption does not count, but Conservative or Neocon corruption counts plus eleven billion times.

Bill Clinton says Iraq has WMDs ^[7] in 1998 and attacks, George W. Bush says Iraq has WMD in 2003 and attacks.

Bill Clinton takes money ^[8] from oil companies and the price of oil goes up ^[9], George W. Bush takes money from oil companies and the price of oil goes up.

Ted Kennedy gets drunk, takes drugs and runs over people with his car afterward. Rush Limbaugh gets drunk, takes drugs and smuggles viagra into international airports.

Bill Clinton has warrantless wiretaps ^[10] in 2000, and George W. Bush has them after 911.

In fact Barack Obama is doing the very same things George W. Bush did as president like spend a lot of money, keep the Iraqi war going, keep the Patriot Act, warentless wiretaps, etc. Obama can do all of that with a free pass because he is a Liberal and Bush was a Conservative.

Yes we can move automotive jobs to Mexico as part of the stimulus plan. ^[11]

Yes we can waste the stimulus money on pork projects renamed to something else. ^[12]

Yes we can support Warentless Wiretaps. ^[13]

Yes we can support the Patriot Act and keep it going. ^[14]

Yes we can delay the withdrawal of troops from Iraq even if Obama promised not to do so. ^[15]

Yes we can raise taxes to pay for healthcare. ^[16]

Yes we can destroy 2.2 Normal jobs to create 1 Green Job. ^[17]

Talk the talk

Learn the dialectic ^[21] and become a Liberal, through liberal-speak! Often confused with Ebonics or Jive.

Think Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, or anyone else that tends to use words with excess syllables. Practice aloud--I say, "How are you?"--you say, "Extra-orda-nin-tat-ious!" Or, I say, "How do you feel about mandatory affirmative action minority interviewing requirements?"--you say, "Abso-ma-lutely, affirmable, as an accidental alibi fortituously found by the hooker behind the crackpipe!"

Presentation and panache is what you are seeking my liberal sheep of many colors.

Furthermore, you must take all efforts to avoid being tied down to a singular position. Life is multi-faceted, so every issue may have new considerations, so you must be able to explain why, for example, it is permissible to cheat on one's wife, but then run a negative campaign (the next term) exposing one's opponent for marital infidelity.

When perfected, you can be constantly inconsistent like the Democratic Party, not inconsistently inconsistent like John Kerry. This constant inconsistency, called "liberal flip-flopping", may allow your party to win the Presidential election! (Listen to this one, liberals, and win in 2008!)

Hillary Clinton demonstrates liberal-speak:

Sabotage the Nation

The Liberal plan for the war in Iraq: 1. Cut 2. Run

Tip

Always blame conservatives, always.

Use the filibuster as much as you can when the other party has a majority ^[23]. If they try to pass a bill you agree with like alternative energy, filibuster it and vote against it. Then when election comes up later, claim the other party did nothing to help the people. When the other party claims that you voted against every bill on the table, say that you could not compromise the environment, freedoms, liberty, ect. and ignore that lobbyists were putting money in your pockets to kill the bill. Always blame the Republicans for your own misdeeds. After all, one liberal made the claim "And so when I filibustered 14 hours and 13 minutes in 1964 I never got off the germaneness of the subject.", since the US Taxpayers are paying your salary, might as well waste their time and hold up progress. Read from a phone book, quote the complete works of Shakespeare, talk about pot or liquor, anything not relating to the bill in question that you are trying to filibuster. When it comes to war, always do the exact opposite of what conservatives want.

Turn your failures to lead the nation, solve problems, and do your job, into your political career like Nancy and Harry have done. The L is for Liberal!

Popular bills that liberals have voted down:

• Social Security reform
• Health care reform
• Removal of eminent domains laws
• Tax breaks
• Bills to cut spending and create a budget surplus
• Bills to drill more oil wells and lower the cost of oil
• Bills to fund the US military so soldiers can be paid, also provide education and medical care for veterans of foreign wars

If the above fails, you may also try to say that the other person is a racist, rich conservative who wants more tax cuts and less regulation. Pork Projects liberals have added to bills:

• Paving highways in wealthy cities
• Studies of cow farts
• Study of the study of the study of political polls conducted by third parties they have paid off
• Federal contracts they get kickbacks from
• Funding for sports stadiums

Or you can vote Republican, hope they screw it up, and win all the popular vote for the 2008 election.

There is so much more in this guide than can be copied and pasted here.  I encourage you to have a look for yourself, unless you are squeamish.  If you know someone that is on the verge of liberalism, print it out in a handy guide form & orchestrate an intervention with your conservative, free-thinking friends.  You might also want to start your own foundation that researches this deadly disease we call liberalism.  Many have succumbed to it - in fact a little more than half of the nation or 50.4% according to last election's numbers. It afflicts millions and is a silent killer - many suffer in silence and are scared to admit that they have the disease. It is a cancer that medical science has yet to tackle but whose source can easily be traced and eradicated if we're serious: the MSM. Won't you help today by distributing these disturbing facts to your friends, neighbors, & family? The life you save could be the next President of the United States...but more than likely will just be some whino pan-handling in downtown Detroit.